Letter to You…

You don’t know about my silent cries at night. You’ll never understand how much I still hurt inside from your mistakes. I’m so damage to the point I don’t think I can love anyone anymore. There is an emptiness in my heart. Nothing can make it feel whole again. Sometimes I blame myself for not leaving when I had ways out. Every time I tell you the truth you can handle it. I can’t stick around with someone who damages my heart. You were my first heartbreak. I was never the since that day or shall I say night. As I’m writing this my face is stained with tears. That shit stills hurt! Every time it replays in my head. The pain still feels fresh in my heart. Even though I want someone special in my life. I don’t think I’ll be able to love them like I want to. I’ll be stuck in fear that they will intentionally break my heart. I hate that it has to be this way.

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© Reflection of Des 2017

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Confessions of a Passionate Writer (Collaboration)

First, I want to thank Kirah for collabing with me. We collab with each other on why are we passionate about writing. Be sure to read her article Confessions of a Passionate Writer: from the UK to the USA. For those of you who are not familiar with Kirah. She is a traveler who currently resides in England and is finding her footing in this world by eating, teaching and of course living out of a suitcase to write about the beauty that this world has to offer. Visit her blog https://hmmkiki.wordpress.com/ to read more of her posts! 

My love for writing…

I can truly say I’m a writer. There’s not a day that goes by without me thinking about writing. I love seeing pages in my notebook filled with my soulful words. God gave me this gift and I’m loving it! I was always good in English. I didn’t know my gift was showing early. Now I’m glad I realized it. Every time I write down my feelings, thoughts, and ideas it relieves me. It gives me a breath of happiness. I would be lost if I didn’t find joy in writing.

Writing is a way to get my voice heard. It helps me to reach out to my readers and touch their hearts. Honestly, it means a lot to me when my readers read my posts. Y’all are my biggest supporters! I try my best to make a positive affect on everyone. I feel like it’s my purpose in life to connect with my readers or anybody else through my writing.

Starting my blog open up my eyes to how good I am at writing. My blog started off as a hobby for me. Now it’s a job that I enjoy doing. I get excited when I have new articles to share with my supporters. Sometimes, I have to laugh at myself at my excitement for writing. You can’t blame me for acting that way because not everyone enjoys writing.

Before I end this post, I want to most importantly thank God again for blessing me with this gift. Now I finally see my purpose in life. My passion for writing has given me happiness, a voice to say what others are feeling, and to inspire others who have the same dreams as me.

Thanks for reading my post. Please don’t forget to visit Kirah blog and read her article Confessions of a Passionate Writer: from the UK to the USA. 

© Reflection of Des 2017

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Started off My Morning on the Right Track

Good morning beautiful bloggers and readers.😊 I’m in a great mood this morning. This doesn’t happen too often cause I’m not a morning person lol. I tried something different that I don’t usually do. When I woke up I laid in bed for a while and was on my phone. A little while later I decided to go eat breakfast with my sister. For breakfast, I had strawberry and banana yogurt (yummy right?) and grilled chicken breast. I know it’s a weird combination to eat for breakfast but I was fine with it cause the food wasn’t too heavy on my stomach. After I had my weird breakfast lol I noticed it gave me energy. Lack of energy is something I always have so I was thankful my breakfast made a difference for me this morning.

My sister and I did a workout after breakfast. To be honest, eating a nice breakfast and doing a workout made me feel energized. Also, it put me in a great mood. I’m trying to start eating healthier and exercise more. Everyone, please pray for cause I know this will be a little tough for me to keep up with. I’m hoping everyone has an amazing day!

© Reflection of Des 2017

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Coping with Depression (You’re not Alone)

Dealing with depression is tough. It’s even tougher when you feel like you have no one to talk about it with. Depression makes you want to isolate yourself from everyone. There is a feeling of sadness, rage, and a head full of negative thoughts that linger inside of you. Lying in bed all day and night starts to be a regular routine. Please do not feel ashamed that you go through depression.

Just know that you’re not going through it alone. I go through depression myself. When I’m feeling this way I don’t want to be bothered at all. I have to lay in bed and cry things out. Then I have to comfort myself to reassure myself that I will get better. Since I can’t talk to anyone that understands what’s going on. I had to learn how to make myself feel better.

Some of you might be thinking why don’t you get out of the house to do something to make yourself feel better. From my experience that only helps for a short while. When I get back home I’ll be attacked by my depression again. This is why I have to cope with my depression either through my writing or trying to reverse my negative thoughts with positive ones.

This article is a dedication to anyone that goes through depression like me and doesn’t feel like anyone understands you. I will be that person you can vent/talk to about how you’re feeling. That’s if you feel comfortable with that. Depression is serious. We all have to find ways to overcome it. Everyone deals with depression different so don’t worry. Sharing your experiences can help others too!

Here are ways anyone can contact me if they need advice or want me to share their experiences on my blog anonymously. Don’t be afraid to come talk to me.

Email: des.inspires@gmail.com

Twitter: reflectionofdes

Instagram: @reflectionofdes
Facebook: Destiny Allen 


Featured Image Source/Credit: UnSplash (Naomi August)

 

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It Happens Every Year 🙇🏽‍♀️📆

I shouldn’t have to see myself cry over the same thing every year

When will this feeling stop?

Trying hard to fight it

But it feels like nothing is working

I’M FED UP!!!

 

Photo Source/Credit: UnSplash (Volkan Olmez)

© Reflection of Des 2017

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Focusing on Myself and I’m Sticking to It

My Thoughts

This year is about me focusing on myself. I spent so much time focusing on other nonsense. I failed to realize I wasn’t making my own self happy. I started doing things that weren’t in my field of interest. I had to force myself to be happy with it because of others opinion. They were getting to me in a way. Eventually, I got to the point where I was fed up. This is when I push myself to feel confident in my skin. Many things I say may sound cliche, but it’s no other way to explain details about me.

It doesn’t matter to me if someone judges my choices. I’m not trying to live up to their expectations. I know what’s best for me. As time goes by I’m shaping into the person I’m supposed to be. Guess what I’m completely fine with it. No one will stop me from chasing my happiness! If you read this post tell me what’s your main focus for this year? 

© Reflection of Des 2017

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A Poem Dedicated to Men from a Woman

I don’t think all of you treat women bad

Don’t assume I have that perspective about you all

Yes, I had my bad experiences with men breaking my heart

Or shall I say “boys”

Some of you do play with females like toys

I’m not writing this to argue

So don’t take this the wrong way

Pay some respect to women

Maybe one of them will turn out to be your wife one day

How do you expect a woman to love you wholeheartedly

If you don’t do the same

Remember don’t cause us pain

Cause if you do your head may hit a window pane

 

Photo Source/Credit: UnSplash – Clarke Sanders

© Reflection of Des 2017

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No Point in Getting my Hopes Up 

I hate getting my hopes up

Things never happen the right way

Sometimes I want to curl up in a ball 

And cry forever 

Giving up is the only thing I can do 

Why me??

GIF Source: Twitter

© Reflection of Des 2017

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Qualities that Attract a Girl Like Me

I’m not a picky person when it comes to finding qualities that attract me. I don’t expect anyone to be perfect. We all have our flaws. I won’t hold your mistakes against you. I like to get to know someone before I talk about what type of person they are.

List of Qualities…

Intelligence: Having knowledge is so important. I mean you don’t have to be the world’s smartest person but I need someone who I can connect with on an intellectual level.

Caring: You have to care about my feelings. I can’t be with someone who is selfish.

Understands when I need space: Sometimes I need “me time.” I don’t always like to feel smothered by my partner. Time away from each other sometimes will give me a chance to miss you more.

Does sweet things for me without me knowing: Surprise me sometimes. You don’t have to buy me gifts all the time. You can write a sweet letter expressing how you feel about me, getting me my favorite food, or listening about my day. Maybe even telling me how beautiful I am.

Loyalty: Loyalty represents if you’re going to stay by myself no matter what we go through. You have to have my back sometimes through certain situations. If you show me loyalty I will give it back to you. It connects with being trustworthy.

Honesty: I can’t trust you if you won’t tell me the truth. Even if my feelings get hurt by your honesty. I will still be happy you didn’t lie to me.

Trustworthy: It’s plenty of people who broke my trust. You have to show me genuine trust. Remember I can sense when someone isn’t trustworthy. DON’T TRY TO PLAY GAMES WITH ME!

I’m not done yet…

Ambitious: You have to have some type of career goals. It doesn’t have to be some high-status job. I will support your dreams as long as it’s nothing illegal.

Nice Smile: I’m a sucker for nice teeth! I want to see your nice smile shine in the sunlight lol. Why do I sound so lame?

A sense of Humor: I’m a goofy person who loves to laugh. You don’t have to be a comedian but try your best to make me laugh somehow.

Positive Person: I will always need positive vibes surrounding me. I can vibe with negative energy.

Kind Heart: You have to have a kind heart because I won’t feel safe with a cold-hearted person.

Maturity: We can play around sometimes. Let’s be honest, some point of time in our lives we have to be mature. I can’t be with a childish person who makes poor choices in life.

Faithful: It’s no point of me getting serious with you if you not going to be faithful. I shouldn’t have to go into deep details with this quality.

The list could go on…

I can name plenty of other things but I’ll stop the list here. These are the most important qualities that attract my attention. Like I said earlier in this post I’m not a picky person. Even if you don’t have all of these qualities. I can still make something work out.

Gif Source: Twitter

© Reflection of Des 2017

 

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Be in a Relationship that Makes You Happy 

When you first meet, someone make sure you take your time to get to know them. Taking your time with your potential boyfriend or girlfriend helps you learn what type of person they are. Of course, when you have feelings for someone you’re ready to rush into a relationship. That’s not always a good thing. Sometimes you’ll see warning signs before a relationship starts. The warning signs could be unnecessary lies, flirting with any person they talk to, and disrespecting you. To be honest, we all get into relationships ignoring obvious warning signs.

Most of the time it’s our fault we are in bad relationships. We want to believe that anyone that we like is automatically “the one.” That’s not always the case. This is when you realize you’re not happy with the person. To be happy in a relationship, you must learn the qualities you want in a person. Most importantly you must love yourself first. They always say you have to love yourself first to know your worth.

Everyone deserves a happy relationship. You’ll know when you’re in one because you will start glowing. The relationship will make a positive effect on you. You won’t have any major fights like your other toxic relationships. I mean I know all couples have arguments, but you will be able to pick out a silly argument from a toxic argument. Nobody wants to feel stuck in a miserable relationship.

If you feel like you’re not happy anymore be honest with the person you’re with. This is not an easy thing to do because you may not want to hurt the other person’s feelings. In the end, they will appreciate you for being honest though. You never know they might feel the same way. You deserve happiness! Always remember to stay true to yourself. Don’t let an unhealthy relationship steal your happiness.

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© Reflection of Des 2017

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