Sometimes I wonder why I have to be stuck in this miserable ass town. I’m trying to not get swallow in the big hole of being stuck here forever. I keep asking God “why me?” Everyone else has a chance to be free and enjoy life. I barely get a chance to feel like a real adult. There’s always some shit that’s trying to hold me back. I’m tired of it all.
There are times where I reflect on how miserable my life is. I’m young and should be enjoying myself. Most of the time I have no choice but to stay in the house. It gets depressing at times. I don’t have any real friends to hang out with. If I do it’s every blue moon. Fuck having friends anyway. They always tend to be temporary anyway. The only thing that’s pushing me to live a little is to make my dreams come true. It’s my only hope and brings me happiness. If I don’t succeed in that then what’s the point in pushing forward?
I’m always getting my feelings crush. Honestly, I’m used to it. The only person I can depend on is myself. Everyone around me is full of negative energy. There’s no one there to at least uplift me. They’re miserable with their life and trying to rub it off on me. I’m not going to be like them. I will be better than them. I’ve reached my breaking point. That’s why I’m living for ME! I can’t keep letting these obstacles bring me down.
At this point, I’m starting to think what’s my purpose of being here? To live a fucking miserable life? All my life, I’ve been invisible anyway. Everyone treats me like a non-factor. Even the ones I personally know. Some of them are reading this post. It’s not because they care it’s because they want to be fucking nosey. They don’t give a fuck. I don’t care for them anyway to be completely honest. This is me expressing how I feel if anybody feels some type of way about it. I don’t care about that neither.