Catching Feelings for Someone You’re Attracted To

Have you ever tried to stop yourself from liking somebody? It’s like you try to force yourself to not catch feelings for them but it happens. Even when you try not to think about that person you still have them on your mind. Each thought consistent of a future you could have with the person or how much time you want/wish you could have with them. There’s a spark in them that attracts you. Fighting your feelings is a tough battle. One thing you can’t deny is the fact that your feelings don’t lie. Deep down inside it uncovers the truth behind whatever you’re trying to hide.

Forcing yourself to not catch feelings seem impossible in a way. Sometimes it’s better to go with the flow of life. Let your feelings flow freely. If you feel bold or brave enough make your feelings known towards the person you’re attracted to. Make sure you carefully thought about how to approach the situation though. Try not to put yourself in an unnecessary situation. Figure out why you are trying to fight your attraction towards a person. Is it because of your past? Maybe you heard bad rumors about your crush. Possibly you made a vow to yourself to not fall deep for someone new but it’s not turning out how you thought it would. You see we all have our reasons to why we try to avoid catching feelings. It’s a risky circumstance to put yourself in. Especially if you have doubts about it.

It’s okay to be open about your feelings for someone special. Being open about your feelings can lead to something life changing. Just remember not to forget why you are careful about your feelings towards the person you are attracted to. Like I said earlier in the article your feelings don’t lie. If it’s obvious that the person is no good for you, please don’t pursue to make things serious with them. They are not worth losing yourself for. Be smart, happy, and accept your fate! 

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Tips on How To Support Others

Showing support towards others shouldn’t be as hard as most people try to make it seem. Some people would rather see someone struggle instead of helping out at least a little bit. I guess society has most people scared to show genuine support towards another person because you’re helping “competition.” Why can’t everybody win and help each other out? Hopefully, the tips that are shared in this article will motivate you to start supporting others more. 

Show your Support

Share a person post on social media: Whenever you see someone asking for support or help on social media see what you can do to help them. Most of the time a person will ask you to share or simply like their post. Try sharing and liking their post even if you’re not interested in what they are posting maybe your followers are though. The only time you shouldn’t worry about sharing their post is if it’s something illegal, inappropriate, or something you’re against. It’s not hard at all to share a post. You share everything else on your timeline anyway!

Show Interest in their content or product: If you like a product or content someone post make sure you bring it to their attention that you like what they are posting. That can help them keep sharing stuff you like. Also, they will appreciate your support. Your support can make a positive effect on a person. 

Show support and you will get support back: Have you ever noticed once you show support towards others they will do the same to you? Sometimes you should make the first move to get yourself noticed. Once you catch the person attention then they will automatically go to your profile and see what you’re all about. Basically, you get yourself some exposure through socializing on social media or maybe even talking in person because they may be interested in what you’re doing.

Let’s start supporting others more. I challenge you to share one of your Facebook friends, IG, or Twitter followers post if they are trying to promote their business products, website content, or party etc… Your one or more shares can make a difference. Before you go answer this question why do you think people make it difficult to show support to others?

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I Started a T-Shirt Business (Come Support Me)

Hey readers, I have some exciting news to tell you! I started my own T-shirt business. Yes, your girl Reflection of Des has her own t-shirt store. I’m happy about this new journey. This is my first time selling shirts. At one point, I was hesitant about starting this business because of money and deciding if this is something I’m serious about. After doing a lot of thinking I finally decided to put work into my new business. I am praying it grows successful.

Just in case, you’re wondering my t-shirt store consist of graphic tees with quotes on them. I have a different variety of shirts for everyone. Whether you are young, old, a man or woman etc… you will find a shirt that’s perfect for YOU! CLICK HERE TO VISIT MY ONLINE STORE. Down below is shirts I am currently selling. If you like a shirt please support me and purchase one or if you know someone who would like one share it with them. Each sell will help me produce more shirts. Also, I will be launching more shirts too!

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SHIRTS I AM CURRENTLY SELLING

Click on the name of the shirts to see more details about it.

Blog Your Heart Out: $13 USD (Available in the colors Black, Pink, Grey, Green, Purple, Red, Light Blue, & Burgundy)

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

KING Tee– $15.00 USD: (Available in the colors White, Black, Dark Green, & Dark Grey)

 

 

I’m a Baddie Tho – $16 USD (Available in the colors Blue, Purple, White, Light Purple)

 

 

Write Your Heart Out – $13 USD (Available in the colors Black, Red, Pink, Orange)

God Blessed You Hoodie – $21 USD (Available in the colors Dark blue, Red, Black, Grey, Pink)

 

God Blessed You T-Shirts – $15 USD (Available in the colors Black, Red, Blue, Green, Pink, Light purple)

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5 Ways to Deal With a Nightmare

Nightmares come and go when they feel like it. The worst part about it is the fact we can’t control when it happens. It leaves us waking up in fear and not wanting to fall back to sleep. In this article, you will read a few tips that may help you if you are having nightmares.

Remind yourself it’s not real: Dreams can feel so real especially nightmares. It’s important for us to try to remind yourself in the dream that it’s not real. That reminder can calm you down a bit in your nightmare.

Pray: This is a tip you don’t have to do if you don’t want to. From my experience, I prayed to God to get me out of some of my nightmares and I woke up out of the bad dream. Once I start doing that it amazed me how prayer actually worked. It may some crazy to you but trust me it worked.

Don’t eat junk food: This is one of the most common tips. In case you didn’t know eating junk food before bed can cause nightmares. It may sound weird but it’s true. Crazy how food can affect how we dream. Just like any food can affect our mood. I believe it may be a myth though. Here are articles about junk food causing bad dreams:

Do Certain Foods Really Cause Bad Dreams?

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/dream-factory/201501/do-certain-foods-really-cause-bad-dreams

17 Foods that Cause Bad Dreams

https://www.eatthis.com/foods-bad-dreams/

6 Foods That Can Affect Your Dreams & Sleep

https://www.bustle.com/articles/136513-6-foods-that-can-affect-your-dreams-sleep

Use a dreamcatcher: Most people like to have dream catchers above their bed to catch their bad dreams. It’s a way of protecting you while you’re sleeping. Indians were a firm believer of the dream catchers. Even though I have one I never experience it taking away my bad dreams. Everyone is different though. You still should try it out.

Sleep with a Bible: If you carry a Bible with you then you should sleep with it under your pillow. My grandmother told me how she use to put her Bible under her pillow to keep her safe. I always thought it was clever.

After reading this article, I hope you find some tips that will work out for you. If you do try some of the tips share your experience in the comment section. What are your thoughts on nightmares?

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Urban Fiction Books You Should Read

Finding urban fiction books are tough if you don’t know any good authors or bookstores who sell those type of books. Even when I was younger it was hard for me to find books by black authors. When I finally discover where to get urban fiction books it felt like heaven. In this article, I will list good urban fiction books you should read. All the books I list are books I read before.

That Girl is Poison by Tia Hines – Desiree Jones was abandoned by her mother. She had to stay with her uncle and his abusive wife. Everything gets worse when she gets involved with this dude name Malik who leaves her pregnant and with HIV. Check out the book review I did on this book. Amazon price: $14.95 USD (paperback) $4.99 USD (Kindle price) 

The People vs. Cashmere by Karen Williams – Family tragedy happens which leads Carmen and Cashmere to live with their hateful aunt. To survive the sisters turn to drugs and prostitution. Carmen starts to get jealous when their pimp falls in love with her sister Cashmere which led to crazy events to happen. Amazon price: $6.99 USD 

Moth to a Flame by Ashley Antoinette – Raven’s dad is over the drug trade. He tries to keep her away from the street life but she falls in love with a stickup kid name Mizan who wants a come up. This book is really good. I believe I cried when I read it too 😂. It had drama you would’ve never seen coming. Amazon price: $3.99 USD

Mina’s Joint by Keisha Ervin – Mina gets out of the hood and is engaged to the Mayor’s son in her city. Everything seems perfect but things are not what they seem. Her life goes downhill when her childhood crush Victor Gonzalez comes back into her life. This book took so many twists and turns I wasn’t expecting at all. If you enjoy this book then you can read part 2. I haven’t read part 2 yet.  Amazon Price: $7.26 or $6.99 USD (the two cheapest prices I saw) 

Home Wrecker by Dwayne S. Joseph Lisette is a beautiful woman who works at a elite firm as the head fashion designer. One day her co worker Marlene comes to Lisette about a business deal that will make her wealthy. The business deal is to set up Steve (Marlene’s husband) to expose him as a cheater. While working her regular 9 to 5 job Lisette starts getting paid to ruin marriages as a Home Wrecker. Everything is going well until a strange caller threatens her life. I am just going to say this everyone got what they deserved in this book. Click here to read my review on the book. Amazon price: $6.99 USD 

Full Circle by Ayana Ellis: Carin is a young girl who was a stick-up kid with dangerous thugs in Brooklyn, NY. Then her lifestyle changes when she meets Monty. He is the guy who knocked her off her feet. Monty is an influential man in the streets of Brooklyn. Everything is going well between him and Carin until their relationships turn abusive and came with other hellish events. Man if I am not mistaken I cried when I read this book. It’s a thick book but worth reading. Amazon Price: $6.99 USD 

Diary of a Street Diva by Ashley Antoinette & JaQuavis Coleman: This book is truly a page-turner. It’s about the wife of a hustler name Caesar dying from a fatal gunshot. He has to go on trial for her murder. On the morning of the trial, he discovers her diary that holds hidden secrets of her past he never knew about. Amazon Price: $5.26 USD

The Prada Plan by Ashley Antoinette: This was the first urban fiction book I read. After I read this book I got hooked on the book genre. To be honest, this might be one of the wildest books I ever read. The story is about a girl name Diaysa Morgan who falls in love with a guy name Indie and tries to hide her treacherous lifestyle. The lifestyle is filled with drugs and prostitution. This book has a whole series. I didn’t get to finish the whole series though. Amazon price: $5.99 USD

After reading this article I hope you go and check out the books. Let me know if you want a part two of urban fiction books you should read. If you have read any of these books tell me in the comment section. Have you ever read urban fiction books before? Also, before you go I will list stores where you can buy urban fiction books.

List of Stores

Walmart (in the book department in the African American section)

Thriftbooks (randomly search up an urban fiction author then click on a book buy them then you should get other suggestions of other urban fiction books)

Amazon

Barnes & Noble (have to find the books by the author name. You may have to write down a list of authors before you go in the store unless you have specific books you are looking for)

Books- a- Million (they used to have an African American section like Walmart but I believe they got rid of it. So, just find the books by the title or author)

If I find more stores I will update this list. I only list the stores I purchase books from.

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Why a Person Grows Bitter Inside

A person doesn’t wake up one day and say “oh I will be bitter today” it’s always a story behind a bitter person. Yes, it’s hard to see past the individual bitterness but take your time to look deeper into why they act that way. One of the main reasons they may feel resentful is from some type of hurt they endure from the past or present. Not everyone is forgiving when they experience a heartbreaking situation. The happiest person in the world could go through a hurtful situation that may turn them into a bitter person. Like I mention not too long ago a hurt person grows bitter from past or present experiences.

Let’s say a woman or man went through a relationship where they loved someone wholeheartedly then their significant other cheated on them or does something to cross their loyalty. The man or woman who got crossed never got the apology they deserved or simply chose not to forgive the person who damages them. As days, months, and years went by they kept the pain buried deep in their heart or soul. When a person holds all that pain inside of course they are going to turn into a toxic human being. It’s only so much a person can hold in. Let’s not act like bitterness randomly appears out of nowhere and consume a person. There is a reason behind everything.

Now, think about this scenario a woman name Teresa came up with a business plan that would benefit everyone around the world. Teresa confides in her business partner about the plan. The business partner took her plan and took all the credit for it. Teresa wasn’t too happy about how everything took place. She felt humiliated and stupid for trusting someone with her golden plan. That was a slap in the face. Now she is stuck in a situation with seeing her ex business partner living off the luxuries of the business idea she came up with. No one ever cared about how Teresa felt. So, what do you think she did? Fought to take what was hers then when that didn’t work out she grew a grudge against everyone. That grudge led her to grow bitter inside.

Are you understanding the point I am getting at? As people, we are quick to say someone is bitter or an evil person by nature. Sometimes that is not exactly true. That one bitter person was probably once a good-hearted person until they let their emotions or past experiences take control of their life. No one wants to live a miserable life. Like I mentioned at the beginning of this article I stated, “A person doesn’t wake up one day and say, “oh I will be bitter today.” Just remind yourself to be more understanding with someone. But also, don’t let someone take advantage of you either.

Do you know someone who is bitter inside? Were you understanding with the person or you kept your distance away from them? If you don’t know anyone like this can you answer this question at one point were you bitter inside from a past situation? Feel free to share your story or thoughts in the comment section.

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Women Provoke Men to Do Crazy Things

One thing that annoys me is the women who provoke men then play the victim when the man does something crazy to them. I have no respect for you if you are this type of woman. Especially, if it is a man or person who doesn’t deserve to be in a situation like this anyway. This is a message for those type of women STOP PLOTTING TO DO STUFF LIKE THIS. It’s not cute at all. One day, something crazy will happen to you then no one will believe you because all you do is cry wolf.

So, I am scrolling through my timeline on IG I see one of my followers post a screenshot of a message they got on Facebook messenger. Basically, the person on the message was telling my follower to stop reacting to their post, their tired of the bs, and my follower better be careful before they have to bury their kid. Now that last part of the message threw me off guard. Honestly, I took the threat seriously and it wasn’t directed towards me. People love talking reckless on social media it’s crazy.

Anyways, so after I read the screenshot I then read the caption of the picture. My follower started saying “the moment you don’t want to be with someone anymore and you react to the stuff they post on your wall and they inbox you this.” Then my follower proceeds to say that the person who message them is desperate and have nothing going for them self. Alright, so that was what my follower said. The person name got tagged in the IG post too.

The problem I have with this situation is the fact she intentionally tried to bother her ex-boyfriend. If you so call don’t want him then why are you taking your time to get some type of attention from him. Since I am being honest about the situation I feel like she is embarrassing herself more than embarrassing the man. Think about this if she didn’t react to any of man posts then he probably wouldn’t have sent her that crazy message. Even though I don’t know both of them personally I am just commenting on what I saw on social media. Seems like my follower is drama filled anyway.

The whole point of this article is the fact that most women do certain things intentionally to provoke men. Once the man does or says something bizarre to the woman then she wants to play like a victim. I can’t stand when any female does that. I swear they take advantage of the whole fact they are a woman and can technically get away with the situation. If you are going to bother a man or a person in general to the point you provoke them to do something crazy. Be ready for the person to spazz out on you!

For the women who love provoking men please stop it because you knew exactly what you were trying to do. You want the man to act crazy, so you can make him look like a bad person and take things to the extreme. If you get offended by this then you are probably a person who does stuff like this.

No, I am not saying a man or anyone, in general, should put their hands on a woman or do anything else crazy. I am saying if you keep bothering a person and hitting that nerve where they want to spazz out then don’t be surprised when they turn deranged. Every action gets a reaction. Watch how you do certain things. You are a foul person anyway if you do something evil then put the blame on someone else.

So, you made it to the end of this article I want to know your thoughts on this topic. Yeah, I may have started up a debate… oh well someone had to speak up about this. Do you think SOME women provoke men in situations? Have you ever been in a position where someone provokes you to do something out of your character? Let’s have a discussion in the comment section.

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Men Explain This

On social media, most of the time I see different men go crazy over attractive women. Especially the ones who are well known or popular all over the internet. Of course, it is in men nature to look at women. I am talking about the men who stay on social media apps for hours and are in the comment section of a lot of women pictures. It’s the same username you repeatedly see in the comments over hyping the woman. It’s nothing wrong with complimenting a woman but don’t make yourself look thirsty.

I have a question though why do most men always glorify IG models or baddies (sexy women) on social media? I mean I know the women are beautiful and all but dang why can’t you give the regular cute chick some attention sometimes. You don’t have to make yourself look thirsty or anything. What is wrong with a less popular woman on social media. Is it because she is not showing enough of her body or being sexy on the gram? I need some answers.

Even though most of you do not know exactly what I look like unless want to or trying to follow me on social media @reflectionofdes (hint hint) I am not ugly. I got a cute little face, but guys do not seem to pay me any attention and I am actually a decent person. Of course, they would not know that because they NEVER try to talk to me. I guess cause I am not wild or sexy enough.

Then again when I think about when men give popular women on social media attention most of the time they have the wrong intentions anyway. All attention is not good attention. I know those women get tired of those thirsty men all in the comments or their DMs. Hell, even an average woman like me get a few thirsty DMs every now and then. Thank God it is not too often. I swear men are thirstier than women. Then they think or believe if they keep bothering a woman she will finally give him attention. Sometimes it does work but the majority of the time it will result in the man getting blocked or embarrassed because the woman posts screenshots on their profile of messages and comments. We all know how that goes.

From a woman point of view the whole excessive DMs that is annoying and a big turn off. At least a turn off for me. Yes, I know all men do not hype up most women on Facebook, Instagram, or Twitter that is why I try to carefully say SOME! So, do not come at me crazy! What makes the social media famous women so special? Their attractiveness, the easy access to see pics of them, they are the type of woman you fantasize about? I am so eager to know the answer.

Another thing I want to mention is I am not hating on those type of women. I do not blame them for showing off their beauty. It is paying off nowadays most companies want to see a sexy or beautiful face to promote their products anyway. They know those faces bring attention! Do not get me wrong everyone is beautiful in their own way though. This whole article is about how curious my mind is about men opinion about these women.

If you read this article until the end I want to know your thoughts on this topic. We can have a discussion in the comment section. Do you think men always draw their attention to women popular on social media? Even if you disagree with some of the things I mention in this article let me know.

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Argumentative People on Social Media

Why are most people on social media argumentative? I swear they have huge balls behind their phone or computer. This is why I refrain from commenting on certain posts. I am the type of person who can’t stand going back and forth with others unless I have a reason to. Most of the time the social media stuff is not that deep. People love to get in their feelings when you have a honest opinion.

For example, last night I commented on a YouTube video stating my thoughts on the video. The video was about a famous YouTuber getting exposed because supposedly he is cheating on his girlfriend. Read the picture below to see what I commented:

final youtube comment

Okay, so you read what I commented right? There are 14 replies on it. 2 or 3 people out of the 14 replies were coming out me funny/crazy because of what I said. My thing is I don’t care if  you reply to my comment but don’t try to start an argument with me. Sometimes people fail to realize it’s not what you say it’s how you say it. For some reason before I publish the comment I had a feeling someone was going to try to start something for no reason.

Anyways, some of the rude replies was telling me to “use my head or brain” basically trying to call me stupid. Also, calling me a little kid who believe in fantasy relationships. First of all, I wanted to come through my phone and curse them out. Y’all it was burning me inside. Then I thought to myself it’s pointless and stupid to argue back with them. Another thing I want to mention is I think the whole relationship goals stuff is stupid to a certain extent. Clearly the person was talking junk and don’t know anything about me.

reply first black

2nd negative nancy black mark

On thing I did do is reply back to one of the negative comments. Basically I told the person I understand their point. The supposedly side chick could’ve sneak and record her with the famous YouTuber. She wouldn’t be the first person to try that. Read the picture below (I marked out the person name I was replying to out of respect):

blocked out name

So, after I replied back saying that. The person wanted to make it into a big argument. I decided to not reply. It’s childish. Then with the other negative comments I left it alone. Now I fully understand why celebrities turn off their comments on social media. I don’t blame them at all.

Anyways, back to what I was talking about. Random people on social media tend to find ways to turn something positive into something negative. In my situation, I believe the people in the replies wanted to prove me so wrong that they wasn’t trying to understand my point of view. The main reason why I wasn’t quick to call the man a cheater in the comments because…

1) I wasn’t there with him if he was messing around with the woman.

2) There are so many individuals who make up scandals on YouTube just so they can become the next big thing

3) I clearly pointed out that I am not trying to say the man is innocent at all.

I guess they couldn’t comprehend what I was trying to get at. Maybe they should use their BRAIN! lol Why am I being petty? Arguments always happen on social media it’s mainly up to you whether or not you want to entertain the bull shit. What are your thoughts about people being argumentative on social media? Do you think I took my situation last night in the wrong way? Put your thoughts in the comment section.

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A Strong Presence in the Room

Have you ever been home alone and felt another presence in the room? Like the feeling was so strong you knew for sure someone else is in the room with you. If you don’t understand what I mean. Basically, I am asking have you ever been in a room alone and it feels like someone else is there too. The crazy part about it is the fact you can feel them but not see them. I always believed it is a dead family member lingering in the room. Maybe if it’s not a dead family member. It could be the presence of a person who used to live in the house before you moved in. I bet this is probably creeping you out. You’re feeling a little paranoid just by reading this. Don’t worry I won’t frighten you too bad.

If you had this experience before does it feel weird to you? Maybe you even thought you were going a little crazy. Trust me you weren’t going crazy at all. The energy you were feeling was real. The only reason I am saying that is because I had the same experience. No, I haven’t seen anything float across the room. All I kept feeling is a person present in the room. Another funny thing about it is the fact that this happens randomly.

Let’s think of another theory. The presence could possibly be the spirit of God coming to visit you. Maybe it’s a way of him letting you know he’s still there for you. Sometimes we need that reminder. That probably didn’t cross your mind until now. This gives you something to think about. There are times we get caught up in worldly problems and we sometimes forget all we need to do is pray to God for help.

Do you have any theories on why sometimes you feel a strange presence in the room? If you had a similar or exact experience share how it made you feel. Did you get scared? Also, let me know if the two theories I mentioned came to mind as you were reading.

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